I haven’t yet decided if the entertainment my sister and her boyfriend provide is worth the pain I must endure as the witness.
New low: She called him last night from the bedroom to the living room. I mean, our apartment is kind of long, and sometime those 30 feet can seem daunting if you’re feeling extremely lazy. But calling him? Their bedroom is close enough to my couch that I could hear both sides of the conversation.
“Where are you?”
“The couch. Where are you?”
“The bedz. You come to the bedz meeting soon?”
Let me explain. #1. They’ve gotten into a nasty habit of ending every word they possibly can with Zs. Like lolcats but much, much worse. Example: of all the things he could have said when she showed him her new phone last month, he says, “Gasp, you haz the fancy phonez now?” And of course she answers with “I knowz!!” When she came to the living room one night empty handed, he asks, “You no find the cordz?” I think they’re just doing it in an ironic, sarcastic kind of way. I think. (I hope!) But it’s very possible it could also just be in a weird kind of way. Saddest thing about this: I’m not even exaggerating.
#2. They like to conduct “meetings” whenever they can. The first of this was early in the fall when they decided it was essential for them to have a book club meeting on my bedroom floor that I was not invited to. This “weekly meeting” has since only occurred once. They also frequently have “couch meetings.” Meaning they both sit on the couch. This one happens on a regular basis. And of course the “bedz meetings” I mentioned before.
I must say, though, she’s got it pretty good. Many of their “couch meetings” involve her stretching out with her feet on him and him arranging his laptop or dinner plate to accommodate her. He’ll also cover, uncover, wrap, or unwrap her feet with a blanket at her every wish (which is very frequent, especially it seems through the quiet parts of movies). And from my outsider’s view, her biggest frustration with him is that he occasionally sits too close to her on the couch. As if the fact that he wants to be near her is a bad thing.
And speaking of The Boyfriend, I have to admit I also have it pretty good. You know the worst thing about this roommate of mine? He does the dishes way too often. I’ve literally had to go out to the kitchen and yell (or speak sternly) at him to “put that dish down! That’s not yours!” Sigh, it’s a tough life I live.
